http://phazedmahogany.tumblr.com/

It’s always one thing after another. I’m getting sick of people trying to control me....

Sun, 19 May 2013 18:01:19 -0400

It’s always one thing after another. I’m getting sick of people trying to control me. I’m getting sick of people’s bullshit. I’m tired. My patience for people is running thin. I don’t want to be a bitch but all my emotions that i have been holding in for a long time are going to soon show…..hopefully not though. i can’t wait to go to college so i can have a break from the shit at home and around me. It’s not the solution to my problems but at least i can have a break..

I can’t stand the feeling when someone tells me how they feel about me but i never got the chance to...

Thu, 09 May 2013 20:13:10 -0400

I can’t stand the feeling when someone tells me how they feel about me but i never got the chance to tell them how i feel about them. This is one of the worse feelings in the world. I wish that i would’ve told him as soon as he told me that he was attracted to me. I’ve been wanting to tell him my true feelings but for some reason it’s been hard for me to even call him. Maybe its not the right time for me to tell him yet. I need to be patient and let everything play its course. I’m tired of waiting though. Sigh….

Brother Sister Time

Mon, 01 Apr 2013 23:20:07 -0400

Yesterday, my brother and I went for a ride for about 2 and a half hours yesterday. We had a heart to heart conversation. He blamed himself for some of the mistakes that I made because he didn’t make time to talk to me about situations in life and how to deal with them. He felt like he wasn’t being a good brother to me. I didn’t want him to blame himself for my choices. Sometimes in life we are put in certain situations in order to make us more wise and spiritually strong. Everyone walks their own path. i’m glad that I went through the things that I did because I can help someone or even my children in the future if they are going through similar things. He held my hand on the way back home letting me know that he’s here for me and that he loves me. Love my bro :)

A daughter's confession to her father......

Mon, 01 Apr 2013 23:06:01 -0400

Ok so I showed my dad my tattoo today. Ironically, he did’t have to work today so when I saw him I thought that it was a perfect time to tell him. Deep down inside I was terrified to tell him. Surprisingly, he liked my tattoo! I’m glad he didn’t yell because I just can’t deal with that. He loves the meaning of it, the size and the location. Something tells me that if I hadda told him earlier, he probably would’ve went with me to get it done. I was sweating and being scared for nothing.lol. I’m glad that he knows now. Lol. I’m glad that’s over. Confession time is great!

Wow!

Sun, 10 Mar 2013 15:42:59 -0400

Wow is all I can say. This week has been very interesting to me. One of the guys that I stopped talking, text me out of nowhere. A close friend of mines found out he’s a father. Wow. I tell you life is full of surprises. Congrats to him. I’m so happy for him. Everyone is growing up. He’s waiting for me to have a child but nooooo not yet. lol. Not ready for all that.Too young for that right now. I would love to give my parents especially my mom a grandchild some day. :)

Bleh Homework

Tue, 05 Mar 2013 20:42:18 -0500

Tonight is just one of those nights where I don’t feel like doing homework. I’m not in the mood. The only thing I would do tonight is study for my spanish test. I just want to listen to music and relax my mind…….

My Grandfather

Tue, 05 Mar 2013 19:58:13 -0500

I just thought about my grandfather and how I miss him so much. It brought me to tears. Every March, October, Father’s Day and my birthday, I have to realize that he isn’t here with me anymore. His birthday is coming up in a few days. I know he’s probably disappointed at me because of the choices that i had made. I wish I can talk to him again. I wish I can skate with him again. I wish I can play games with him again. I wish can take pictures with him again. I wish he was here. Another reason why I want to do photography is because i want his legacy to live on forever in my life and in my heart. I miss you Grandpop and I love you.

I want to do photography. After i graduate, i want to buy a camera as a treat to myself. I already...

Tue, 05 Mar 2013 16:27:41 -0500

I want to do photography. After i graduate, i want to buy a camera as a treat to myself. I already picked out my camera online. Hopefully i would have the money to get it by then.

I’m sitting here on the bus thinking like I want friends that’s willing to explore and...

Tue, 05 Mar 2013 16:15:33 -0500

I’m sitting here on the bus thinking like I want friends that’s willing to explore and enjoy life. For example, i want to be able to go to the art gallery, go skating, attend poetry sessions, and other things a such as kayaking with friends. it’s really boring doing the same ish over and over again. Try new things

other picture waiting for the bus

Mon, 04 Mar 2013 20:45:14 -0500

other picture waiting for the bus

Let’s just hope and pray that he would say yes. hopefully he would be my prom...

Mon, 04 Mar 2013 20:22:23 -0500

Let’s just hope and pray that he would say yes. hopefully he would be my prom date…… cross fingers

Me when i was 13. My cousin was 20. We look like a watermelon!...

Mon, 04 Mar 2013 18:11:59 -0500

Me when i was 13. My cousin was 20. We look like a watermelon! lol

My little cousin. Lol. he couldn’t handle the flash from...

Sun, 03 Mar 2013 10:48:04 -0500

My little cousin. Lol. he couldn’t handle the flash from my phone.

My little cousins at last year’s family reunion…....

Sun, 03 Mar 2013 10:44:00 -0500

My little cousins at last year’s family reunion…. All of Lil John John’s kids. Ctfu. Gotta love my family!

i was bored. waiting for the bus.

Sun, 03 Mar 2013 10:37:20 -0500

i was bored. waiting for the bus.

This is my ish…. Listen to this song in my art class or...

Wed, 27 Feb 2013 22:42:46 -0500

This is my ish…. Listen to this song in my art class or while I’m doing my hw. Love their music.

“Turn the volume up just a tab for the neighbors.” -Tiron and Ayomari

I’m in love with this song. It would be nice to have...

Wed, 27 Feb 2013 19:54:02 -0500

I’m in love with this song. It would be nice to have someone who can accept my me and my flaws.

“Can you accept my flaws when it all comes falling down?” -Dizzy Wright

I love this song. It gives me a classic hiphop mood. I think...

Sun, 24 Feb 2013 19:44:00 -0500

I love this song. It gives me a classic hiphop mood. I think this is one of the songs that I will constantly play in summer. One of the songs to relax to.

“I talk to God and told him show me the way. Look I took the time just to work on me And now all the problems I had are just rolling away.” -Dizzy Wright

This song has been coming on my Pandora alot lately. Have you...

Sun, 24 Feb 2013 19:26:47 -0500

This song has been coming on my Pandora alot lately. Have you ever wondered why a song may play frequently especially if it relates to how you feel deep down inside? This song gets to me everytime it comes on my pandora. Most of the time, I will skip it because I wanted to fight my feelings. Today, I just decided to take it as it is. I didn’t want to fight it anymore. I listened to the song twice and accept my true feelings.

“Did I ever cross your mind anytime?”- Brian Mcknight

Ok so i went skiing in blue mountain. Let’s just say i had the time of my life! I had fucking...

Sat, 23 Feb 2013 22:11:02 -0500

Ok so i went skiing in blue mountain. Let’s just say i had the time of my life! I had fucking fun until i got home. She had to be the one to ruin my fucking mood. Really? Why are you fussing about nothing? I just can’t… They say going to bed mad isn’t good for the heart. tonight looks like I’m going to be doing just that. I was already tired when I came in the house. I just need a break.